I
was talking to a friend from college recently and she said, “I know you are all
about positive reinforcement to encourage the behaviors you want, but what if
they do something bad? Like something they know they shouldn’t do? Do you yell
at them?”
I realized at that moment, that in all my passion to post all of these ideas of how to teach your dog what TO DO, instead of punishing for what you don’t, I neglected to state what I do in the interim: like when my dog chases my cats or jumps up on the counter. Those are things that I’m not willing to ignore. Nor, do I.
I realized at that moment, that in all my passion to post all of these ideas of how to teach your dog what TO DO, instead of punishing for what you don’t, I neglected to state what I do in the interim: like when my dog chases my cats or jumps up on the counter. Those are things that I’m not willing to ignore. Nor, do I.
I
have yelled at Gracie, I have smacked her butt a time or two, but what I use
most often is the equivalent of when your Mom would say, “You’ve really
disappointed me” and I say, “No, ma’am, that is SO SAD.” I say it in the same
tone every time and each time, she goes to her bed or the couch and puts her
head down on her paws and stares at me. I didn’t explicitly teach her that, but
she’s learned over time that I won’t fuss at her anymore if she does that. After a few minutes, I say, “Ok” and she runs
over to me for hugs and love.
Dogs do bad things. Sometimes, they do really bad things like eat an entire couch, or tear down the blinds in every window in the house, but harboring those emotions will only hurt the relationship between you and your dog. Allow yourself to act like a 3 year old for a minute and stomp around huffing and puffing as you pick up the minuscule beads from the now-shredded bean bag you just bought your child yesterday. Your dog knows that you’re unhappy. THAT is why they are cowering, or in Gracie’s case – putting her head down on her paws. It’s not the behavior they did an hour ago or even five minutes ago. So, after your toddler tantrum, don’t shun your dog. Think hard about WHY they did it:
Is she bored? Is she not getting enough attention? Did anyone exercise her today? Have we taught her that the bean bag is not a dog toy? Is it anxiety? Who was supervising?
Dogs do bad things. Sometimes, they do really bad things like eat an entire couch, or tear down the blinds in every window in the house, but harboring those emotions will only hurt the relationship between you and your dog. Allow yourself to act like a 3 year old for a minute and stomp around huffing and puffing as you pick up the minuscule beads from the now-shredded bean bag you just bought your child yesterday. Your dog knows that you’re unhappy. THAT is why they are cowering, or in Gracie’s case – putting her head down on her paws. It’s not the behavior they did an hour ago or even five minutes ago. So, after your toddler tantrum, don’t shun your dog. Think hard about WHY they did it:
Is she bored? Is she not getting enough attention? Did anyone exercise her today? Have we taught her that the bean bag is not a dog toy? Is it anxiety? Who was supervising?
Once
you figure out the "Why?", situations like this will happen less and less. Focus on your dog’s positive attributes and
expand on those as much as you can. By strengthening them, you form a better
bond with your dog and you’ll find that many of their flaws will shrivel up, and
eventually, be a thing of the past.
